I have
friends for three years we got really know each other, and of course we are
best friends. We connected like best friend. At the beginning I was not attracted
to him. I thought he was cute and simple, but it is not someone who would go
after. Furthermore, I come from a bad relationship, so recovered is not really
my thing. We have started talking about random things via AIM to know one
another. Each school to see each other. On first we are just only texting then finally
turn to, talk on the phone, and our first conversation on phone took 02:00 o’clock
in the morning. It really is the sign for us to be the best of friends.
Laughing, talking, as dorks; how best friends act on one another. We have
started talking about relationships in a night, and he told me he liked it, the
individual, he liked flirting. As a friend, yes, we flirted a lot, but I never
thought anything of it. By the time he began to be something like a brother to
me.
One night
he told me that he started to develop feelings for me, and I told him that I
have nothing. We are just friends. He took it, but I think I was too stubborn
to see that I was growing feelings for him, I noticed. Over time, he wanted to
talk about other girls and I'm jealous. I do not understand why until he reached
me that I do. Feelings for his junior year was my time to realize it. We talked
about it and decided that friendship is too important to risk. We got both
understand that.
Graduation
year came around, and my feelings getting stronger. April through, and it is
broke. I spilled everything. I told him my feelings too strong to continue on
the ground. People thought we had come, when they see us together. I t was like
we were unofficially there, but only the best of friends. It's complicated.He told me
that he is not yet ready for such a committed relationship, and I understand it.
Our whole life takes us. I told him I would wait, wait until he was ready for
something like that.
During the course, I did not believe him. And I felt like
I prepare it in every difficulty. The whole thing got in the way of our
friendship. I know I would if something happened to us, always the best friends.
That exactly what is important to me, but every time I see him it is
noticeable. Even now, almost everything is destroyed. Then someone has come
back in his life. Someone who he has had history with. They had feelings
for each other since the seventh grade, but they do not do something about it. They
stopped talking for sophomore and junior years, and automatically back up the
senior year. The feeling back to him, and it's pretty painful. I think that
because they are now talking and hanging out, I'm just best friends now. No,
when I'm ready I'll tell you, it is now the best of friends. I let myself too
much to think about everything, and I let it get in the way of our friendship.
I want him to be happy, but it lacks self, the one to make them happy? But for
me, I would still wait for him, I love him. I do not know if he likes me, he
can, I think, now this way. He told me he wants me, but now I know that now.
It's all so confusing, and I'm always thinking about him. I do not know what to
do now.